Friday, February 18, 2011

Beary Hard 6 Months

Today on Brinley's 6 month angelversary I received a very special gift from one of my bestest friends. A weighted teddy bear that weighs as much as Brinley did when she was born, 6lbs 1oz. She took the time to pick out an outfit and fill the bear with rice and rocks until she weighed the right weight. She also gave me a card with a lovely note in it telling me how much she loved me and how often she thought of Brinley.

She got the idea from Molly Bears where I am currently on the waiting list. I can't believe how heavy she was. It also made me realize how important donations are for Molly Bears. It costs a lot of money to make these bears and ship them out to mothers that are missing that weight in their arms. So if you feel it in your heart I urge you to make a donation to Molly Bears in Brinley's name for her 6 month angelversary. You can make a donation HERE.

 So a big hug and thank you to Jenna! I love you girl.

So my husband and I watch this HBO series called Big Love. We have been getting the DVDs from Netflix and are currently on season 4. We last season Sarah, the daughter of Bill and Barb who are polygamists, had a miscarriage. Now when she got pregnant she was unmarried and a teenager and in this article the actress that plays Sarah talks about how she feels let down that the writers had her character have a miscarriage.

Well I hadn't had Brinley yet when I saw that episode of the miscarriage so I don't remember it affecting me as much. We are now watching season 4 and in the episode I just watched last night Sarah is now married and something she did in that episode got to me. She had taken in a lady and her baby and was taking care of the baby while the lady was away. Well Sarah's mother and father showed up and told her she had to give up the baby because the mother was saying that Sarah had taken her baby. Sarah held onto the baby and you could tell she finally had in her arms what she had been longing for, the baby she had lost. She was surprised with herself for the emotions she felt towards that baby. It made her realize that she had some ignored grief that she needed to deal with. I love that someone realized how having that baby in her arms would have awaken those emotions in her.

This bear, my Brinley Bear, has filled a little of that void I've had in my arms. I can't wait to hold my baby again one day.

Loving and missing her always! <3