Thursday, January 20, 2011

God is at work

Today is my 4 year wedding anniversary. I love my husband so much, I couldn't have asked for a better person to be my mate. He woke me up to breakfast in bed. He is so good to me. I think for our anniversary we will go paint pottery somewhere. Probably at Blue Waters Pottery. The anniversary gifts are either (traditional) flowers & fruit or (modern) linen or silk so I was thinking we could go paint some pottery with flowers. It would be something we haven't done before and I think it would be fun.

So class tonight was very interesting. God has put someone new in my life that I need but who may also need me. As you may know Brinley's 5 month anniversary was this last Tuesday so I didn't attend class since the instructor said the subject matter would be too much for me. Well tonight we went over another story we were to read called "The Jilting of Granny Weatherall". Basically it is a woman on her death bed who is drifting in and out of consciousness and recalling various parts of her life. At the end she finds out there is nothing afterlife, just darkness. That is a horrible thought for a BLM to have, that when we die that is it so that would mean that Brinley just died into nothingness. No I can't accept anyway...

This caused one student to speak up about an experience she had while she was "on her deathbed" two years ago. She was 6 months pregnant and got an infection of her blood called Sepsis. The infection got to her baby and she lost it. While her whole family was with her at the hospital her grandmother had died of cancer the day before in another state. She saw her grandmother wrap a pink crocheted blanket around her baby girl and walk out of the room with her. Well she obviously got better since she is in class with me but she has suffered the loss of her daughter at the same time she lost her grandmother. Her story made me cry because my loss was only 5 months ago and my grandmother crocheted a pink blanket for my daughter although she never got to be wrapped in it.

Well I went up to her after class and introduced my self to her and we talked for a while after class. Turns out she has spent the last two years grieving for her daughter with pretty much no support. She hadn't met anyone else that had suffered a stillbirth. She was no longer with her ex that she had her daughter with and has felt like she didn't really have anyone to talk to about her daughter.

I really feel like God is at work here. I was so worried about making it through this class without breaking down but now I know there is someone else in the class that understands where I'm coming from. Not only that but I can be the person she can talk to about her loss. I'm really happy that I got to meet her tonight.

I also want to give a shout out to another BLM that has become a great friend. I came home tonight to find a picture posted of Brinley's name in the snow she had asked her mother to do for her. That is something we had in common, that we both named out babies Brinley! I blogged about her here but we have become great friends now. So here is that beautiful picture. I love it when I find out someone else is thinking of me and my Brinley. <3