Saturday, November 20, 2010

Grabbing for the pieces

Brinley is on my mind all the time. Everywhere I look I see Brinley. I see her in bumble bees, butterflies, dragonflies, dimes, rainbows, and well everything. I feel like I am grabbing for the pieces of memories. I am trying to fill a void that can't be filled. So I buy jewelery, request name pictures, and buy art work that reminds me of her. I may not be spending my money on diapers and wipes but I'm sure making up for it in memorials...

I wake up in the morning and think about her. I drive down the road and think of her. I sit at my desk at work and think of her. I never thought that I would have so much to think about a baby I only knew for 9 months. I don't like trying to grab for the pieces, I wish I could grab and hold onto her.