I was laying in bed last night and had something I thought was so profound that I wanted to blog about it. Now I can't remember what it was. I should have got up right then and got it out. Dang it man.
Tonight is the night before the Walk to Remember event at the hospital I had Brinley at. I am nervous and excited about going tomorrow. I anticipate it will be a hard day but am looking forward to remembering my daughter. (Not like I haven't been thinking of her of every minute of every day.)
Yesterday I woke up at 7:30am but didn't want to get out of bed all day. I finally got up around 11am to take a shower but I really would have loved to stay in bed all day long. I guess that is what it is like to be depressed. Not wanting to get up or deal with people. Some days it is like that...I don't want to be bothered.
Monday I start therapy for the first time in my life. I wonder if I am really messed up enough to need therapy. I am afraid that the therapist will tell me that I am fine and I don't need to come back again. I don't feel like I am fine. I want to be able to think clearly again. I am so forgetful and absent minded these days, I think the therapy will help. I hope so.
On a lighter note we received our Brinley tree today. Mark's aunts got together and bought us a Okame Cherry tree in honor of Brinley. It is very pretty with pink flowers. I can't wait till it blooms but first we have to find the perfect home for it in our yard.